Tuesday, January 24, 2012

Things I Hate





Peanut Butter

I hate peanut butter. And I don't care who knows it. It was brought to my attention that today is "National Peanut Butter Day" and I was inspired to make a list of all the other things in this world that I hate. This list is not comprehensive, but rather more of a stream-of-consciousness rambling of what I hate.






I think it's the smell. I like eating peanuts, and I do like the taste of butter. But mixed together? Gross. Can't stand it. I hate peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, I hate peanut butter candy, I hate peanut butter cookies. All of it. The worst.




Beans


This mostly applies to refried beans in a Mexican food setting. Even spellcheck doesn't like the word refried. Or spellcheck for that matter. They have perhaps the worst texture in the world, add nothing to the quality of the burrito, and look gross for that matter. A mushy brown paste? That's supposed to be appealing? Is there a food that looks more like human waste?

Chap Stick
I refuse to put on Chap Stick, even if my lips are raw and bleeding. I just really don't like the feeling of it on my lips, it all tastes terrible, and I get really self conscious when my lips are shiny. Also, as this guy makes clear, it's unmanly. Actually, that's probably not true, but I just don't like it. Plus I don't want to carry it around all day. Also, it smells bad.
The Cubs
This one is pretty self explanatory. They're awful. The fans always think it's "their year". They come to Miller Park and try to cramp the Brewers' fans style. Plus, they're from Chicago. I also don't like the Bears, but they've actually been semi-successful in their existence. 









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