NFL Draft: Bill Burr

This is fantastic. A little NSFWish, but spot on.

Jockey Crack

"Finishing at the rear of the field"

You clever British announcers.

Amy Schumer

Have you ever watched something, and cringed because of how well it's executed? Satire at it's finest.

Star Wars Trailer

New Star Wars trailer? Eh.



Disney stock going up on the day of the release? Not a coincidence.

Rice Krispie

I don't have much of a sweet tooth, and chocolate isn't really my thing. But this, I'm a fan of.




Via NBC News: 

A group of students at the University of Wisconsin-Madison said Sunday that they cooked up a Rice Krispies treat that shatters the Guinness World Record for the largest cereal treat by half a ton.

The group, called Project Freshman 15,000 — a reference to the notorious "freshman 15" — set out on a goal to construct a 7½-ton version of the classic gooey cereal treat while raising money for charity along the way, according to a statement from the school.

The student volunteers, led by the visionary of the project, Joe Tarnowski, started melting the butter and marshmallows Thursday morning and finished up Sunday with a Rice Krispies treat that was 11,327 pounds. While the finished product was a tad short of their goal, the group is still confident they beat the world record, which was set in 2010 with a brick of Rice Krispies weighing 10,314 pounds, according to Guinness World Records.

Boston Bombings

The verdict in the Boston Marathon bombing case came down today, and it surprised no one: Dzokhar Tsarnaev was convicted on all 30 counts that he was up against. The only question now is whether or not he will die via capital punishment or if he'll rot away in prison.

Of course there are some people rejoicing that justice was served, but for some, those wounds are not healed. I follow a few members of the Boston media on twitter, and one said "As a Bostonian, runner & someone at the marathon on 4/15/13, today strangely brings no feelings of satisfaction. Just a terrible tragedy."



From well over 1,000 miles away, it's hard to truly empathize with what went on within that community, so I can only speak to what my experiences were here in La Crosse today. I remember it vividly because I was still a relative newbie to radio (even moreso than I am now), and I remember selfishly thinking "how am I going to handle this on the air?"

I also remember how unique the event was in that it played out in real time both on television and social media as well. Watching a literal manhunt develop on the internet was fascinating, although I hope we never have to do something again.

Special thoughts and prayers go out today to the families off all affected by the bombings almost two years ago.

Just Another Monday

Posted earlier this morning at lacrosseradiogroup.net/sports

Today should be fun, right?

I mean, I’d love to be in either Milwaukee or Indianapolis right now, but them’s the breaks, right? My Facebook feed is rapidly filling up with posts by my friends getting ready to tailgate at Miller Park, or ones that were able to score tickets to the NCAA championship game tonight at Lucas Oil Stadium. I have obligations here in La Crosse (which I am excited about, trust me), but really, I’m just jealous. Plain and simple.

First things first: How about the Badgers? I’m not totally sure how to properly characterize the upset. In Vegas terms, it wasn’t that big. Wisconsin was a five-point underdog, against a team that they lost to by one the year before in this exact same game. Badgers haters were quick to point that out over the weekend. But in other, unquantifiable terms, it was huge. Kentucky was THE team in college basketball this season, and THE favorite heading into the tournament. They showed all year that they were beatable, but for 38 times in a row, they hadn’t been.

What was encouraging as a Badgers fan was that they won without playing perfect. They played well, don’t get me wrong, but Kentucky shot better from the field, from three and from the FT line. Granted, Wisconsin made more threes and more free throws, but the point stands. The Badgers also had 10 turnovers, which is a lot for Wisconsin. What was most impressive was they way that they controlled the boards. So much was made of Kentucky’s length and athleticism, but it was the Badgers that had a 34-22 advantage on the glass, led by 11 from Frank Kaminsky. Kaminsky and Sam Dekker combined for 14 rebounds, as did Willie Cauley-Stein and Karl-Anthony Towns, but the rest of the Wisconsin starting lineup (Nigel Hayes, Josh Gasser and Bronson Koenig) out-rebounded the rest of the Wildcats’ starting line-up.

So what’s going to be the secret tonight? Limiting Duke’s trips to the FT line (they shot 27 of 37 against Michigan State!!), exploiting mismatches (we’ll get to that in a second), and continuing to control the glass (duh).

I think that Kaminsky, Dekker and Koenig match up extremely well with Jahlil Okafor, Justise Winslow and Tyus Jones. Call them a wash, just for argument’s sake. That leaves my X-factors as Nigel Hayes and Josh Gasser. Both will need to knock down at least a couple of 3-pointers, and basically win the battle vs. their Duke counterparts. I’d be ok if Duje Dukan stepped up and hit a 3-pointer or two, as well.

Is this a team of destiny? It sure feels like it.

Now, BASEBALL.

I know it’s a loooooong season, but 1-0 would certainly feel great, because, you know, hope springs eternal. Let’s go Brew Crew.

Citizen's Police Academy

Last night, I had the unique opportunity to get drunk on the taxpayer's dime. One of the things that the Onalaska Police Department does is offer a Citizens Police Academy for anyone that lives or works in the city, and they get to learn some of the ins and outs of the business. It's pretty neat. But this week in the academy, they were learning about drunk driving, OWI, DUI and the things that police officers look for when it comes to enforcing those laws. Of course, to be able to best teach this topic, they needed test subjects.

That's where I come into play.

I got connected with the Onalaska PD to come in and basically, get drunk. I told them I like a good 7&7, so when I showed up, I was seated with the other "participants", I poured myself a mixer and starting to drink.

It was kind of odd, drinking with cops and strangers in the room, but I quickly made friends, we watched some Wheel of Fortune, and kept drinking. Of course, alcohol is a great social lubricant, so that certainly helped.

They would periodically check our BAC along the way (basically after every mixed drink), and I saw my number gradually climb. .04 after two drinks, up to .074 after three drinks and I hit the magical .08 mark after four (relatively strong) mixed drinks.

My initial reaction? Holy crap, I'm hammered. I'd never ever think about getting behind the wheel of a car at that level of intoxication, but to learn that I was only a .08 was astonishing. After two drinks, I was already thinking to myself "whoa, driving might be tricky now" but to drive home after four drinks would be stupid.


We went through field sobriety tests, which I did not pass, surprisingly. They did the finger test where you follow it with your eyes, the walk-in-a-straight-line trick, plus the ol' stand-on-one-foot game. I failed all three. I asked the officer overseeing this part of the night at which point he would have failed me and he said "As soon as I put up my finger." So yeah, pretty drunk.

I got a ride home and almost immediately went to bed. Pounded some Powerade this morning, finally ate some lunch early this afternoon, and starting to finally feel a bit better later on this afternoon. It was for a good cause, but I kept telling my coworkers this morning that it was an "excused hangover."

Anyways, it was a cool experience. I feel like I learned a great deal of my tolerance levels and what a .08 actually feels like, and I think the more people that want to spend time actually learning our laws and get a better appreciation of what our police departments do is a huge plus as well. Kudos to the Onalaska PD on a great program (and thank you taxpayers for the drinks!)

April Fools Day

Some companies doing April Fools Day are clever. Most are just dumb.

Take a look here.



A wing chain advertising a 100-lb chicken wing. Topical, relevant to their business, harmless. That should be about what you're shooting for.