Friday, August 30, 2013

Doesn't matter, had sex

You know, I understand "heat of the moment" and all that, but does it really strike at Home Depot?

A man and a woman were arrested Wednesday at a South Carolina Home Depot after allegedly having sex in a display shed outside the store, according to a police report obtained by the Smoking Gun. Police were called to the North Charleston store around 8:40 a.m. Aug. 28 and discovered Emily Craig, 20, and Shaun Bowden, 31, partially undressed, according to the report.

"Upon questioning, it became apparent they were engaged in sexual intercourse inside the shed," the report read.

Well, there you have it. When the shed at the Home Depot is a rockin', the police will likely come knockin'.

Tuesday, August 27, 2013

DuJuan Harris headed to IR

Green Bay Packers coach Mike McCarthy announced Tuesday that running back DuJuan Harris would be placed on the injured reserve list, likely ending his season. Harris injured his knee during the second day of organized team activities, and then further injured the patellar tendon in a preseason game against Seattle this past Friday.

Harris latched on with the Packers in 2012 after stops in both Pittsburgh and Jacksonville, rushing for 157 yards and two touchdowns on 34 carries over four games. He figured to factor heavily into Green Bay's backfield rotation, with McCarthy going as far as to name Harris the starter during the preseason.

His absence will leave the running back workload spread out over the likes of Eddie Lacy, Johnathan Franklin, Alex Green and James Starks. The Packers could choose to use  IR/Designated to Return on Harris, which would allow him to return after Week 6, but that announcement had not been made. The Packers don't need this quartet to emerge as a powerhouse, but simply a competent, respectable alternative to the passing game that can excel at blitz pickup and help prevent Aaron Rodgers from getting killed.

Eddie Lacy, the rookie second-round pick out of Alabama, will presumably be the de facto starter for the Packers come Week 1. Lacy averaged 6.5 yards per carry in his 1,322-yard  campaign last season at Alabama, but the stakes will be higher for him in Green Bay. At 5-11, 231 pounds, Lacy will be asked to not only tote the ball but will be invaluable in pass protection for the Packers, who enter the season with a shaky-at-best offensive line. If that line can open a hole for Lacy, he's got the strength and power to hit it with authority, and the Packers will need that balance if they want to make a playoff run in December and January.

By almost every account, rookie fourth-rounder Johnathan Franklin has struggled to meet expectations this preseason. Considered by many a steal in the fourth round, Franklin has rushed for just 23 yards this preseason on nine carries, with a long of four yards. Franklin amassed 2,057 yards rushing and receiving in his senior season at UCLA, but he won't get the volume of carries with the Packers to make the same impact. He will need to make the most of his touches and bust off a few big plays if he wants to continue to see playing time.

Alex Green saw action in 12 games last year for the Packers after being limited in his 2011 rookie campaign with an injury. His 464 rushing yards last season were tops on the squad, but Green still seems to be the forgotten man of sorts in the Green Bay backfield this preseason. He has had one of the few big plays for the Packers in the exhibition schedule to date, taking a toss 31 yards up the left sideline to convert a 2nd & 16 play midway through the fourth quarter on Friday night against Seattle.

In just his fourth season, James Starks is the de facto veteran in the Green Bay rushing attack. He missed most of 2012 with a knee injury after leading the Packers with 578 yards rushing in 2011. His name has been thrown around in trade speculation before Harris' injury, but it seems likely that he will stick around with Green Bay, at least for now.

Monday, August 26, 2013

Miley vs. Gaga

So, for some reason I watched a good portion of the VMAs last night. I don't know why. I'm pretty ashamed to admit it. But...I did get to see this. What are these get ups?

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Is it possible, and I know this might sound crazy, but Miley's get up makes Lady Gaga seem relatively tame?
Photo credit: TMZ

Friday, August 23, 2013

Braun should give back 2011 MVP trophy

Finally. Suspended Milwaukee Brewers outfielder Ryan Braun finally said something.

Braun admitted to a number of things, including being in denial, using a “cream and lozenge” and he also apologized to sample collector Dino Laurenzi Jr.

It was a carefully crafted statement that, in conjunction with his statement to the Brewers’ faithful, Braun probably thought would help start the public relations healing process.

You can read the whole prepared statement here, via the Milwaukee Journal-Sentinel, but here is the statement that stands out most to me:

“Here is what happened. During the latter part of the 2011 season, I was dealing with a nagging injury and I turned to products for a short period of time that I shouldn’t have used. The products were a cream and a lozenge which I was told could help expedite my rehabilitation. It was a huge mistake for which I am deeply ashamed and I compounded the situation by not admitting my mistakes immediately.”

I am certain that Ryan Braun had some level of input in the statements released on Thursday, but it’s also clear that a team of lawyers and publicists had significant influence on what exactly was contained in the verbiage of them.

And the fans aren’t that dumb. At least I hope not.

Picking and choosing exactly the message you want to send is a first step, but if it’s the only step, it’s still a coward’s way out.

He admitted he lied. Good. Great. Wonderful. But it’s just a start. Braun needs transparency at this point if he ever wants to fully re-enter the good graces of Wisconsin.

Sit down with Bob Costas during the playoffs. Hold a press conference and answer the tough questions from the media. Do something more. Give us details. What you used, when you used it, for how long. Vague, prepared statements aren’t enough.

He was ready to proclaim his innocence in front of the TV cameras during spring training on February of 2012, but he won’t apologize in front of them now? Something seems wrong about that.

Braun can say all he wants, but there’s one action he can take that will speak volumes so much louder than any statement he could issue: He can hand over the 2011 National League MVP trophy.

It’s a gesture that would resonate not only across the Brewers’ fan base, but across all of baseball.

He came out and said that he used products during the 2011 season that he shouldn’t have. He admitted to cheating, and he doesn’t deserve the highest individual award that an MLB player can receive for one season. If he didn’t play within the rules, why should he be rewarded and forever recognized as the league’s most valuable player?

I can’t envision a situation where the MLB will force Braun to hand over his trophy. It’s something that Braun should do on his own volition.

Milwaukee went on to win a franchise-record 96 games in 2011. Had Braun not rubbed himself down with magical cream and sucked on these mysterious lozenges, are the Brewers the same team? No one can say for sure.

I’m not a fan of asterisks and changing numbers and altering the record books. That makes things too messy and it would be impossible to make them perfect.

But if you have someone confessing to cheating for a specific season in which he was named MVP? To me it’s a no-brainer. Ryan Braun should return the MVP trophy to help close the door on a regrettable chapter in his career.

Thursday, August 22, 2013

Coca Cola Freestyle

This is quite possibly one of the greatest inventions in the history of forever.

It's called the Coca-Cola Freestyle, and it lets you combine your favorite soft drink with different flavoring for your own unique beverage. Whether you want to add some raspberry to your Sprite or vanilla to your Dr. Pepper, it's remarkable. I've seen a few popping up around the La Crosse area (specifically at newer restaurants) and people are simply amazed by them. I'm right there with them. In fact, I had some grape Mello Yello Zero. It wasn't really all that delicious, but I HELD THE POWER to create my own concoction. If you haven't seen one, seek one out.

Wednesday, August 21, 2013

Interesting study

Believe it or not, I have never been to the emergency room for any reason related to alcohol (including injuries, surprisingly). That could potentially be because I'm not drinking the right beverages (not that I'm trying to go to the ER...let me explain.)

Apparently certain beers are more responsible than others for putting people in the hospital, for whatever reason. And the list isn't all that surprising...

According to the New York Times (who apparently has free time to do this kind of research): 

Nationwide, roughly a third of all visits to emergency rooms for injuries are alcohol related. Now a new study suggests that certain beverages may be more likely to be involved than others.

The study, carried out over the course of a year at the Johns Hopkins Hospital in Baltimore, found that five beer brands were consumed most often by people who ended up in the emergency room. They were Budweiser, Steel Reserve, Colt 45, Bud Ice and Bud Light.

Three of the brands are malt liquors, which typically contain more alcohol than regular beer. Four malt liquors accounted for nearly half of the beer consumption by emergency room patients, even though they account for less than 3 percent of beer consumption in the general population.

Less than 3 percent of the beer consumption but nearly half of the ER visits? It all makes perfect sense.

Monday, August 19, 2013

Ryan Braun

Ryan Braun used to be my favorite player, with the key phrase in that segment being "used to be" rather than is. I could kind of turn the other way and ignore his accusations and technicalities as long as he was still on the field for the Brewers every day. But with his name as a glaring omission from the Brewers' lineup for the past few weeks, it's hard not to notice the other stories and tales that are emerging from this rubble. And if the one that emerged yesterday proves to be true, it's going to be tough to wholeheartedly cheer for Mr. Braun when he returns to Milwaukee in 2014.

Here's what the ESPN report said:

According to sources, Braun called veteran players around baseball privately at that time to lobby for their support. In the calls -- confirmed by three sources -- Braun told other players that in the preparation for his appeal, some information had become known about the collector of his urine sample, Dino Laurenzi Jr., including that he was a Cubs fan -- with the implication he might work against Braun, who played for a division rival of the Cubs.
Braun, who is Jewish, also told the players that he had been told the collector was an anti-Semite.

It's one thing to try to save your hide. It's another to take whoever else you can with you.

Braun needs to see what he took, when he took it and for what duration he took it for. I don't even care why. That part is equal parts obvious and unnecessary. But he needs to start making some apologies. Stat.

Friday, August 16, 2013


So let's start this off by saying that Ryan Braun is still suuuuuuuuuper guilty. HGH, 'roids, testosterone, whatever. He's guilty and serving his time. But A-Rod? Not cool bro. Turning in a bunch of other players to try to save your own hide? It doesn't exactly work like that. Members of your own camp leaking names...this isn't looking good on you, Mr. Rodriguez.

Here's a great quote from CBS Sports' Danny Knobler:

"His problem now is that he does look different, and in the worst possible way. He looks like someone so heavily involved that he obtained documents himself, and so self-consumed that he had no problem implicating others.

It sounded crazy then. It sounds worse now.

Yeah, Alex Rodriguez cares about those other players. He cares about them so much that he was willing to make sure everyone knew they were cheating, too."

Again, Braun is guilty. Not changing that fact. And his transgressions would have eventually come to light. But throwing these fellow players under the bus? Not cool, bro.

Wednesday, August 14, 2013

Air Hockey Robot

I know it's still kinda early, but I think I just discovered my life's calling.

For a few months, I've had an air hockey table in my apartment in lieu of a kitchen table (or really any floor space) and it's been great. Have never regretted the purchase. It's nice to be able to take on friends with the hope and dream that one day I will be the greatest air hockey player in the world.

And then I see this: A creation that is sure to be the bane of all air hockey-obsessed teenagers everywhere, Japanese researchers at Chiba University’s Namiki Laboratory have developed a robot that is skillful, agile, and intelligent enough not only to compete against human players, but to analyze playing styles and use appropriate strategies against its opponents. The Namiki Lab, already known for its work in high-speed tracking, has built on their compiled data and created an agile robot which has the potential, quite insanely, to beat any human at the famous arcade game.
Japan...seriously? Why do you have to crush my hopes and dreams like that. From now on, the theme of my life is Terminator 4 (or 5 or 6 or whatever incarnation they're on): Fall of the Japanese Air Hockey Death Robot.

Tuesday, August 13, 2013

We're The Millers

We're the Millers (2013) PosterAt the end of a relaxing day off yesterday, I decided to head to Marcus Theatres and check out a movie that looked pretty funny in the previews: We're The Millers. It wasn't a hard sell for me, as I've been basically in love with Jennifer Aniston for most of my life, and I really like Jason Sudeikis in most things that he does. The premise is a bit over the top and gets a little dumb at time, but there are plenty of laughs to more than make up for it. There's enough laughs from newbie Will Poulter, as well as Nick Offerman and Kathyrn Hahn to make it enjoyable. It's pretty mindless, but if you're in the mood for two hours of comedy, I'd definitely recommend going to see We're The Millers.

Wednesday, August 7, 2013

Loggers vs. La Crosse

It was certainly an ominous lead paragraph in this morning's paper, in the article detailing the ongoing discussions between the Loggers and the City of La Crosse.

Here's what the open to the Tribune article says:

A dispute over liability for using Copeland Park Field could jeopardize the future of the La Crosse Loggers in the city, team officials said Tuesday. The impasse came after the La Crosse Committee of the Whole backed the city’s version of a proposed 10-year agreement that would hold the Loggers organization almost completely responsible if someone is injured during a team event at the ballpark.

I've never been to one of the Committee of the Whole meetings, never sat in on one of the discussions and have no influence as to what might happen. And my view may be a bit skewed given the fact that I'm employed by the Loggers as a PA announcer. But it really feels like there is a compromise to be made. I understand the sticking point - liability, and I tend to agree with the Loggers' standpoint: leave the liability up to the courts.

In some ways, it's encouraging to see that there is a disagreement. It means that people are standing up for what they believe in. But this area certainly believes in the power of the Loggers, as evidenced by nearly 3,000 fans every night. Again, I don't have any inside information and I haven't been to any of the pertinent meetings, but I don't see how a compromise doesn't happen. The city would be foolish to let the Loggers walk, and the team has established a tradition in the area that I can't see them leaving behind.

Thursday, August 1, 2013

I mean, birds are pretty dumb

More than 100 seagulls found dead in England's Wistlandpound Reservoir may have been intoxicated from eating ants. According to the British newspaper "The Sun," experts suspect the gulls may have been feasting on flying ants, which would have released formic acid into their system. When in the birds' system, formic acid produces effects similar to alcohol intoxication. If that's the case, the birds could have drunkenly crashed into the lake and drowned. A rep for South West Water says they are performing tests on the water to rule out water contamination as a cause of the birds' deaths.
I mean, birds are pretty dumb. I've heard them eating fermented berries but this is definitely a new one. On the other hand, toxic flying ants sound pretty terrifying.